U2 Expresses Heartfelt Regret for Free Release of New Album

U2 has recently taken to the airwaves with a public apology for their misguided hijacking of iTunes libraries everywhere. When their new album suddenly appeared in everyone’s iCloud library, collective outrage ensued. According to the band, this vehement reaction was completely unexpected.

An official statement from their front man declared that the unfortunate decision resulted from, “A drop of megalomania, a touch of generosity, a dash of self-promotion.” Furthermore, the singer embarrassedly said they “might have gotten carried away.”

Apple users around the world scrambled to delete the unwanted “Songs of Innocence,” but they found the task was not a simple ordeal. The way this music was distributed allowed it to become deeply embedded in the iTunes software.

Angry iPhone owners, Brian Torchin being one, quickly assembled to protest the invasion. Their voices grew so loud that the company had to release an official app to expedite the removal process. This tool instantly gives users the ability to retroactively back out of the promotion.


Still, free music is a godsend in this era of expensive production. It must be sad for the band to receive such flak for going against the norms. The worldwide rejection of their gift has left them confused and uncertain of future projects. This profoundly personal collection of tunes earned massive ire by infiltrating everyone else’s personal space. Ultimately, the modern public will not be very forgiving of this perceived transgression.

As Bono himself said, “Oops!”

1 Comment

  1. Donald Duncan says:

    Once the album is gone, the decision cannot be reversed. 26 million devices downloaded the album materials, and it was made available to over 500 million total machines. This equals a lot of potentially aggravated customers. It is very good for essay services to have all that is needed in their database.

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